I SHOULD

I should

This is a message from the past and makes me feel surpassed

I am obligated and feeling under pressure to make things right

Trying to lift myself up and gain new sight

I should have known better and I should have done better

By the time I say this to myself it hits like a hammer

The words continue to go on in a festive yammer

Circling around keeping me in an emotional stammer

I know I should but it doesn’t feel good

Who is this should?

What is this should?

Why is this should?

How do I do should?

The voice of should commands me to morn

Put the dummy cap on and accept the scorn

So this is who you are keeping me in pieces and torn

One of control, repent and a dark faceless scowl

I think you must leave and be quiet don’t howl

You pretend to be big but you are actually very small

I admire your strength and your disguise of tall

The sprinkle of could just washes you away

I am quite excited to find it was so easy in play

To know what I have been, was, said and done

Just a myth of battles that can never be won

Could is the bridge the one that is stable

Sturdy and strong showing I am able

So I stand in I can and wave goodbye

Embracing this yes I can and I will try.