I am innocent and pure full of joy I see on other faces
I am a tiny body of power and I play just living and being
No matter where I go there are smiles from all places
My eyes are open yet it only with my heart that I am seeing
I feel free and loved …In being I give without having to try
I enjoy the moments flowing, it ok to laugh and its ok to cry.
I stumble around getting to know my space.
I fall and get up trusting in my place
I giggle and fall and say Hi my name is April
At two years old I am tall inside say look at me I am pretty special
As I get bigger on the outside I get smaller on the inside
The others say stop that, be quiet, be careful, get out of my way
I learned not to be me anymore it was not OK
I learned to get love there was always a price
I learned to be funny I thought this was right
As a teen I rebelled allot said look at me
Isn’t it OK just look you will see?
I know I am good but why won’t you love me
What is it about me that they cannot see?
I continue with this mask it has worked so good
What the hell do I do, I do what I should
My soul continued to cry, cry even louder
I can’t take this anymore I am me and I have to be
I know I am not happy and not willing to settle
I can’t be like them drowning in the bottle
I look at my daughter and son that need me now
I will not abandon them, be strong but How?
I’ve looked for love outside for so long
It keeps coming back to within lives my song
So here I sit in this internal storm I can’t continue to blame anymore
How do I do it where is this magic door?
God shrink me down to when I was two so that I will know you I am
And what to do.
I walk tall proud of me, saying Hi I am April look at me.
I will accept you no matter what you say because we are all
Alike God made us this way.
The lines in my face show pain and laughs
I have given so much on this worthy path
I cannot change who I am you see
It is time to let go and let me be me.
Rest and love is all we need.
Today I accept this body as is
I will rest and love only be for now
Because that is the gift to share that is how.